Everyone else in the room can see it
by Sibyllaa Dixgard
Summary: "Sherlock, do you want to know how often it is that I wished to have never met you at all over the past three years?"


**So here it goes, the first story I ever uploaded. By far not the first thing I ever wrote but it seems this fandom willed me to finally put something of my imagination up on the internet.**  
><strong>All the rights to the <strong>**BBC/Mofftiss/ArthurCD****, title taken from ****"What makes you beautiful" by One Direction****, I obviously own nothing except for the plot bunny that nestled so very comfortably in my brain, but if anyone does happen to have Benedict to share I wouldn't say no.**  
><strong>Well... I ship them and that's what became of it?<strong>  
><strong>Other than that there's just left for me to say that I'm not a native speaker, this is completely <strong>**un-betaed**** and this is my first time uploading anything (****constructive criticism is welcome****) and if you don't tell me where the mistakes are they won't get fixed.**  
><strong>Comments are highly appreciated!<strong>  
><strong>As you like it.<strong>

* * *

><p>"Sherlock, do you want to know how often it is that I wished to have never met you at all over the past three years!"<p>

"I'd rather not John… Although I'm pretty sure given the amount of incidences on which such thinking could have occurred, the number must be rather high."

He said this with such hurt in his voice that John almost couldn't hold back from the need to pat the other man's back or do something to make that look in his eyes go away.

Sherlock would of course have deduced all what was going on inside of John's head – had he only dared to look up and into his best friend's eyes.

"Not once, Sherlock! There wasn't a single time during our life together that I regretted meeting you, moving in with you; looking back at all the decisions I've made concerning you, there are no regrets.  
>Now what does that tell you?"<p>

He couldn't hide a smile because of Sherlock's - for once - clueless face, his shock and disbelieve and utter confusion so obvious.

"That … you've … gone insane because of living with me? Is that why?"

"No you idiot!"

His smile had grown into a laugh now, rumbling deep in his throat as Sherlock didn't even try to pretend he knew what was going on.

"Because I love you, you bloody I-can-deduce-everybody's-feelings genius."

"I … John how could I possibly not have known that? Since when John? Since when?"

Sherlock's eyes were now travelling across John's face in lightning speed, trying to solve the riddle that had just been presented to his mind.

"I honestly do not know… It was like one morning I woke up and I knew all of the sudden that it had always been you… That there was no other… Hey, Sherlock, are you even listening to me?"

The other man had gotten up from the couch and was now pacing their living room in long strides, words that sounded like  
>"How could I have not noticed"<br>and  
>"I definitely need more data"<br>coming from his lips.

John got up, too and positioned himself right in front of his friend.

"Hey Sherlock, did you just hear me?"

He was all of the sudden uncertain if it had been the right move.

"Yes John, I heard you. You love me and I did not know. I did not notice during the past three years!"

"That's fine Sherlock, I tried to hide it from you and… for most of the time I didn't even know…"

He was cut short as two hands grabbed both his arms.

"John, I did not notice! People do not hide things from ME!"

"So maybe you didn't notice because it was something you didn't calculate as a possibility…"

He was getting just a bit tired of this … and honestly, a bit upset too. You don't go and tell someone you love them without expecting any sort of response. And Sherlock totally freaking out was not what he had hoped for.

"No John, that is not it at all."

"So you mean you've also… sort of…"

"No John! NO! It does not matter if I love you back or not."

"Right, because you're asexual and married to your work and it is more interesting why you didn't deduce my feelings for you. I get it!"

He felt deflated and was ready to run and slam the door in his flatmate's face. Just the fact that Sherlock still hadn't loosened the iron grip on his arms was keeping him.

"No John. It does not matter because I need you. In my life, as my friend, my blogger, my doctor, my colleague, my moral compass, my flatmate. Without you I would not eat, would not sleep. I am pretty certain without you I was not even able to think straight anymore…"

"And those are reasons against telling me whether you love me or not because…? Oh. Sherlock, I will still stay with you. It is completely fine if you just want to be friends…"

He was cut short by a hand that had found its way onto his mouth and was now gently stroking his jaw line.

"John, that's obviously not the reason. I need you in my life more than is wise and if we added sexual activities to our relationship you would eventually expect me to change for you… even more than I already have; because you might not be aware of it but you have changed me already. And the point is, that there is no possible way I could change more. Not even for you John… I have not been made to be in relationships of any sort with other people; which is why you are such an exception."

"Sherlock, I honestly do not expect you to change in any way for me! And don't you think about doubting my word in this. See, I know who I've fallen in love with. And I honestly love you for who you are. There's no romantic idea of how I could make you mine by making a different person out of you behind all this. I'm no schoolgirl Sherlock. I simply love you for being you, and not despite all your moods and the disgusting experiments everywhere and all that, I love you because of it all."

Sherlock had sunken back into the couch during John's little speech and John was again sitting next to him, looking into those eyes that showed how desperately Sherlock's mind was fighting to make sense of it all. Only a low voice came from his mouth  
>"John, I need to … think … process…"<br>and even lower  
>"John, I need… you… I need you John."<p>

He was ready to give in to his feelings, John sensed it and caught Sherlock's collapsing body in an attempt to steady him.

The detective looked up into his eyes and it was obvious that his mind was taking control once again.

"John, I just can't. There is no way I could ever be without you again!"

John moved his hand only slightly to press his palm against the other man's chest.

"I'm not going anywhere, there's no way I would ever leave you on my own decision!"

He brought his face right next to Sherlock's but still held eye contact.

"Just let go; for once. Listen to your heart for once rather than to your beautiful brain, Sherlock."

It was merely a whisper but apparently it was all the other man needed. He relaxed instantly, letting his whole body rest against John's who could feel that wonderful heart under his hand beat even stronger.

After a few moments Sherlock wrapped his own arms around John and pulled their bodies even tighter together, resting his chin on John's shoulder so that he could press his face into the man's neck. They stayed like that for what seemed an eternity and then they both pulled back unanimously, looking deep into the other's eyes, trying to figure out a way to go about this.

Later they wouldn't be able to tell whose lips were on whose first. It started off as a rather shy kiss, but when John finally moved his arms around Sherlock to hold him as tight as the other man was holding him, Sherlock demanded entrance to John's mouth and was granted it with a pleased moan.

After a very long moment John had to regain some air.  
>Apparently Sherlock didn't even need to breathe, smug bastard.<p>

"You know, John, you will have to be true to your word. There is no possible way I will ever let you walk out of my life again now.", Sherlock said with a smirk.

John laughed and pressed another light kiss to the other man's lips before answering.

"Vice versa. So… now that you're mine…"

'…let me think of what to do with you.' he had wanted to say, but Sherlock was already kissing him again.


End file.
